ONE day, at a party in Bath, Quin said something which caused a general murmur of delighted merriment. A nobleman present, who was not distinguished for the brilliancy of his ideas...
ST. PAUL has declared that, when persons, though twain, Are in wedlock united, one flesh they remain. But had he been by, when, like Pharaoh's kine pairing, Dr. Douglas, of Benet,...
A BON-VIVANT, brought to his death-bed by an immoderate use of wine, after having been told that he could not in all human probability survive many hours, and would die by eight o...
where is the fork?
WHY should we explain, that the times are so bad, Pursuing a querulous strain? When Erin gives up all the rights that she had, What right has she left to complain?
FOOTE, from his earthly stage, alas! is hurled, Death took him off, who took off all the world.
IN an election for the borough of Tallagh, Councillor Egan, or bully Egan, as he was familiarly called, being an unsuccessful candidate, appealed to a Committee of the House of Com...
THERE was a certain Daft Will, who was a privileged haunter of Eglington Castle and grounds. He was discovered by the noble owner one day taking a near cut, and crossing a fence in...
MR. ELLISTON was enacting the part of Richmond; and having, during the evening, disobeyed the injunction which the King of Denmark lays down to the Queen, Gertrude, do not drink, h...
DURING a recent representation of King Lear at one of our metropolitan theatres, an old gentleman from the country, who was visibly affected by the pathos of some of the scenes, el...
A LABORER'S daughter, who had been in service from her childhood, would frequently wish to be married, that, as she expressed herself, she might rest her bones. Some time afterward...
HOOK was walking one day with a friend, when the latter, pointing out on a dead wall an incomplete inscription, running, WARREN'S B----, was puzzled at the moment for the want of t...
BISHOP BLOMFIELD, when presiding over the diocese of London, had occasion to call the attention of the Essex incumbents to the necessity of residing in their parishes; and he remin...
AN attorney, not celebrated for his probity, was robbed one night on his way from Wicklow to Dublin. His father meeting Baron O'Grady next day, said, My lord, have you heard of my...
HOOD says that, A Quaker loves the ocean for its broad brim.
A LADY having put to Canning the silly question, Why have they made the spaces in the iron gate at Spring Gardens so narrow? he replied, O, ma'am, because such very fat people used...
IT is said that poor H---- T---- has been living on his wits. He certainly must be content with very limited premises.
TOWARDS the close of the administration of Sir Robert Walpole, he was talking very freely to some of his friends of the vanity and vexations of office, and, alluding to his intende...
A GENTLEMAN passing a country church while under repair, observed to one of the workmen, that he thought it would be an expensive job. Why, yes, replied he; but in my opinion we sh...
SIR JOHN GERMAIN was so ignorant, that he is said to have left a legacy to Sir Matthew Decker, as the author of St. Matthew's Gospel. Churchill (General C----, a natural son of the...
THE conversation at Holland House turning on first love, Thomas Moore compared it to a potato, because it shoots from the eyes.--Or rather, exclaimed Lord Byron, because it becomes...
LORD PLUNKET is said to have acutely felt his forced resignation of the Irish Chancellorship, and his supersedeas by Lord Campbell. A violent tempest arose on the day of the latter...
A MAN entered a shop, saying he should like a two-penny loaf, which was accordingly placed before him. As if suddenly changing his mind, he declared he should prefer two pen'orth o...
A MECHANIC his labor will often discard, If the rate of his pay he dislikes: But a clock--and its case is uncommonly hard-- Will continue to work though it strikes!
A YOUNG man (placed by his friends as a student at a veterinary college) being in company with some of his colleagues, was asked, If a broken-winded horse were brought to him for c...
A STRANGER to law courts hearing a judge call a sergeant brother, expressed his surprise. O, said one present, they are brothers,--brothers-in-law.
WHAT is the difference, asked Archbishop Whately of a young clergyman he was examining, between a form and a ceremony? The meaning seems nearly the same; yet there is a very nice d...
I'M very much surprised, quoth Harry, That Jane a gambler should marry. I'm not at all, her sister says, You know he has such winning ways!