CURRAN'S ruling passion was his joke. In his last illness, his physician observing in the morning that he seemed to cough with more difficulty, he answered, That is rather surprisi...
CHARLES LAMB said once to a brother whist-player, who was a hand more clever than clean, and who had enough in him to afford the joke: M., if dirt were trumps, what hands you would...
WHEN Maurice Margarot was tried at Edinburgh for sedition, the Lord Justice asked him, Hae you ony counsel, mon?--No.--Do you want to hae ony appointed?--I only want an interpreter...
THELWALL and Coleridge were sitting once in a beautiful recess in the Quantock Hills, when the latter said, Citizen John, this is a fine place to talk treason in!--Nay, Citizen Sam...
A MAN meeting his friend, said, I spoke to you last night in a dream.--Pardon me, replied the other, I did not hear you.
MR. HARE, formerly the envoy to Poland, had apartments in the same house with Mr. Fox, and like his friend Charles, had frequent visits from bailiffs. One morning, as he was lookin...
A COUNTRY editor thinks that Richelieu, who declared that The pen was mightier than the sword, ought to have spoken a good word for the scissors. Jerrold called scissors an editor'...
A WRITER, in describing the last scene of Othello, had this exquisite passage: Upon which the Moor, seizing a bolster full of rage and jealousy, smothers her.
CURIOUS coincidences respecting the letter C, as connected with the Princess Charlotte, daughter of George IV.:--Her mother's name was Caroline, her own name was Charlotte; that of...
IN the days of Charles II., candidates for holy orders were expected to respond in Latin to the various interrogatories put to them by the bishop or his examining chaplain. When th...
I AM the only man in Europe, sir, said the Colonel, that ever had a broken head,--to live after it. I was hunting near my place in Yorkshire; my horse threw me, and I was pitched,...
(On bank notes being made a legal tender.) THE privilege hard money to demand, It seems but fair the public should surrender; For I confess I ne'er could understand Why cash called...
A TUTOR bidding one of his pupils, whose name was Charles Howl, to make some English verses, and seeing he put teeth to rhyme with feet, told him he was wrong there, as that was no...
THAT there is falsehood in his looks I must and will deny; They say their master is a knave: And sure they do not lie.
WHAT'S the matter? inquired a passer-by, observing a crowd collected around a black fellow, whom an officer was attempting to secure, to put on board an outward-bound whale ship, f...
AN Irishman charged with an assault, was asked by the judge whether he was guilty or not. How can I tell, was the reply, till I have heard the evidence?
DR. DONNE, the Dean of St. Paul's, having married a lady of a rich and noble family without the consent of the parents, was treated with great asperity. Having been told by the fat...
A PERSON to whom the curiosities, buildings, &c., in Oxford were shown one very hot day, was asked by his companion if he would see the remainder of the University. My dear sir, re...
AN eminent barrister having a case sent to him for an opinion--the case being outrageously preposterous--replied, in answer to the question, Would an action lie?--Yes, if the witne...
JOHN MAGEE, formerly the printer of the Dublin Evening Post, was full of shrewdness and eccentricity. Several prosecutions were instituted against him by the government, and many k...
A NOBLEMAN who was a great amateur painter showed one of his performances to Turner. That great artist said to him, My lord, you want nothing but poverty to become a very excellent...
A FARMER having bought a barn in partnership with a neighbor who neglected to make use of it, plentifully stored his own part with corn, and expostulated with his partner on having...
WHEN Lord Melcombe's name was plain Bubb, he was intended by the administration to be sent ambassador to Spain. Lord Chesterfield met him, and told him he was not a fit person to b...
A CASE of some great offence was tried before Lord Hermand (who was a great toper), and the counsel pleaded extenuation for his client in that he was drunk when he committed the of...
A GENTLEMAN in company with Foote, took up a newspaper, saying, He wanted to see what the ministry were about. Foote, with a smile, replied, Look among the robberies.
IN a Chancery suit one of the counsel, describing the boundaries of his client's land, said, in showing the plan of it, We lie on this side, my lord. The opposite counsel then said...
A COUNTRYMAN took his seat at a tavern-table opposite to a gentleman who was indulging in a bottle of wine. Supposing the wine to be common property, our unsophisticated country fr...
A CERTAIN deacon being accustomed to snore while asleep in church, he received the following polite note: Deacon ---- is requested not to commence snoring to-morrow until the sermo...
DURING the long French war, two old ladies in Stranraer were going to the kirk, the one said to the other, Was it no a wonderfu' thing that the Breetish were aye victorious ower th...
A BRAGGART, whose face had been mauled in a pot-house brawl, asserted that he had received his scars in battle. Then, said an old soldier, be careful the next time you run away, an...